Dear Covid Diary,

Chatting with my daughter last evening, we wondered how many people a serial killer had to kill before they got a name like “The Golden State Killer.”

For some reason, my wife knew this. You have to kill 3 people on separate occasions (obviously) to be considered a serial killer. (Kill just 2, and I guess you are considered to be having a bad year.) She said that once you meet the serial killer criteria, you are entitled to a name (Should I go missing, please arrest her. She is definitely guilty of something with this knowledge. She should be easily found as “The Handsome Husband Killer.”).

That established, it seems like you have to have the word “Killer” in your name. There’s “The Zodiac Killer,” ”The Green River Killer,” ”The Killer Clown,” “Joel Rifkin”…wait, what?

I guess that is not true, right “Son of Sam?” And who the hell was Sam? And did he pass on a family business or did he just suck at parenting?

I went to look up how many people “The Golden State Killer“ had killed. Thirteen. But… he raped 50 and committed 120 burglaries.

That’s quite a body of work. It seems killing was only a side gig. He really should be know as “The Golden State Asshole Thug.”

Curiously,

Brian