Dear Covid Diary,

I am wearing slippers tonight. It’s funny to me. They have treads on the bottom. There is no way I can slip. I tried. I fell forward and now I have a broken tooth. My dog calls me “Chippy.”

So if they are slippers that don’t slip, why are they called slippers and not Stoppers?

Actually, my feet are way too warm in them. They should be called Sweaters.

Of course, duh, I know. Sweaters already are called Sweaters. But what if we changed their name? What if we called them Itchies?

Yeah. They aren’t itchy if you wear an undershirt.

What if you only wear an undershirt? It’s not really under anything anymore. It’s kinda just a shirt.

Fuck. I am going to bed.

Until tomorrow,

Chippy