Ingredients
- 2 cups fresh cauliflower
- 3 tablespoons butter
- ¼ cup diced onion
- ¼ cup pickled jalapeno slices you can get these in the “Goya” section of the super mercado
- 2 cups cooked corned beef brisket
- 2 ounces cream cheese all soft and smooshy
- 1 cup shredded sharp cheddar
- ¼ cup heavy cream
- 2 tablespoons sliced scallions
Instructions
- First thing you need to do, if you want, is to slow-cook a corned beef brisket. Basically, put it in your slow cooker with some salt and pepper. Add water to cover and then cook on high for about 4 hours.
- You can buy prepared corned beef or another brisket but what fun is that, lazy ass?
- Chop cauliflower into bite size pieces or smaller (I prefer nibbletization.). Steam or cook via favorite method until fork tender and set side.
- Set heat to medium-high and add butter, onion, and jalapeno slices to skillet (Salt and pepper too if you wish.). Saute until onions translucent and fragrant.
- Reduce heat slightly and add cooked brisket and zee cream cheese. If mixture begins to stick or cook too quickly, reduce heat a bit. Mix it up with a spoon-thing.
- Continue cooking until cream cheese is heated through and easily stirred.
- Turn off heat. Add sharp cheddar, heavy cream and cauliflower. Stir mixture quickly until all cheeses are melted and fully combined.
- Put in bowls.
- Sprinkle with scallions.
- Eat it.
Tried this recipe?Let us know how it was!
Brian Gerard (Lewandowski) writes books critics call "aggressively adequate"—better than "aggressively terrible" but somehow more concerning. He once traded a MetroCard for a pitchfork on a subway platform and now uses it exclusively for dramatic pointing. He lives on a farm outside Charlottesville, Virginia with three disappointed potted plants, a judgmental pig named Trouble McFussbucket, and a wife who smiles politely at his life choices.
See my Amazon author page and buy my books.
His first manuscript was composed entirely of punctuation marks and confused sketches. He's since published "Not Bukowski" (poems that don't rhyme) and "Slop and Swell from a Festering Mind" (essays so concerning that bookstores check on his well-being). He once spent three hours photographing a rare bird that turned out to be a plastic bag, and he's the only person banned from church bake sales for "weaponized brownies." Inheriting absurdism from Vonnegut and Adams, sprawling narratives from Irving, and weaponized failure from Moore, he writes about conflicted everymen struggling through supernatural chaos.
He has two new, offbeat novels waiting for an agent or a publisher: "Truth Tastes Like Pennies" and "Elliot Nessie."
He remains unconvinced that birds aren't surveillance drones.
More biographic lies...err...info.
See my Amazon author page and buy my books.
His first manuscript was composed entirely of punctuation marks and confused sketches. He's since published "Not Bukowski" (poems that don't rhyme) and "Slop and Swell from a Festering Mind" (essays so concerning that bookstores check on his well-being). He once spent three hours photographing a rare bird that turned out to be a plastic bag, and he's the only person banned from church bake sales for "weaponized brownies." Inheriting absurdism from Vonnegut and Adams, sprawling narratives from Irving, and weaponized failure from Moore, he writes about conflicted everymen struggling through supernatural chaos.
He has two new, offbeat novels waiting for an agent or a publisher: "Truth Tastes Like Pennies" and "Elliot Nessie."
He remains unconvinced that birds aren't surveillance drones.
More biographic lies...err...info.
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